Monthly Archive for April, 2012

Your big lie?

Published on April 29, 2012 in Uncategorized. 0 Comments

I recently held a small gathering of Chief Innovation Officers from some of the world’s largest and most innovative companies.  While most of the content is proprietary from the meeting, the one most insightful observation was one CEO’s approach to evaluating project presentations from project/product managers.  His first question:  what problem are you trying to solve?  Makes sense right, the new idea needs to address a problem/a consumer need.  Then the CEO looks for “the big lie” in the rest of the presentation.  Most presentations at this level are well honed, but in his experience, many contain one big lie.  Many times, the big lie is one of the following three:

  1. The customer wants this new product.
  2. I can make this new product for THIS price.
  3. The customer will pay XX for this new product.

This particular CEO has seen that most projects have one of these “lies” at the heart of the project.

Got me to thinking…

What’s my big lie, around my life, my mission, my career, my story?  We all have a story about our life and our mission.  Story telling is a large part of the Corporate Athlete Course that I taught last year.  See my mission in a previous blog.

What are the common big lies in career stories?  Here are a few that I regularly see:

  1. I have a value prop for this company that is unique.
  2. My value prop is stronger than most other candidates.
  3. I’ve done the research and I know there is a good cultural fit.

I think big lies in career stories deserves another blog for another day.  I’m thinking more philosophically right now, so I’ll ask an even bigger question:

What are the common big lies in life stories?

  1. Fine thank you, how are you?
  2. Yes, I’m happy.
  3. It’s going well.

My 25th reunion was this weekend.  I heard some380215_415921831752273_100000033800616_1634905_1911893777_n[1] of these lies.  Think about your conversations.  Have you heard these lines?  Did the person really mean it?  Did you really care about the answer.

Jim Loehr, a co-founder of Human Performance Institute, who developed the Corporate Athlete Course, wrote a book The Power of Story:  Change Your Story, Change Your Destiny in Business and in Life.  He gives insight into the power of recognizing and writing your old story—those things you keep telling yourself that prevent you from realizing your mission, and then writing your new story.  He suggests reading and re-reading your new story until you start to live it.

My friend Seth Barnes and I went for a 5 mile run.  What I like about runs is that you are trapped.  You kind of have to talk.  And what I like about Seth is that he doesn’t allow lies in conversations.  He probes, he prods, he listens without judgment.  I worked out more in our 45 minutes than I could in days of counseling.

So, two questions to leave you with:

What lies are you telling yourself?

Who is in your life that will listen to you truth?

What Fred Taught Me

Published on April 26, 2012 in Uncategorized. 24 Comments

Well, everything I know about career consulting.  My friend and colleague Fred Drake died today of cancer.  So much will be said about what an incredible person Fred was:  how he cared so much for others, what a loving and caring husband he was, and what a great father he was.  So I won’t elaborate here.  149324_10150830840581276_732691275_12382515_1282155525_n[1]I worked with Fred for nine years here at Darden.  When I joined the team with Fred, I was the rookie.  While I thought I knew everything, he patiently showed me that I didn’t.  Here’s what I learned from Fred, not just about being a great career consultant, but about being a great colleague.

Be patient.  Fred took the long term view of his students’ success. And he did the same with relationships.  He hung in there with me when I was new, standing up for students and lobbying for colleagues.  He challenged my challenges, and argued my arguments.  Yet, he did it with grace and charm, so that I always was compelled to listen and consider his point of view.

Be tireless.  Fred worked incessantly for his students.  He took their success personally.  We would be playing poker on a Tuesday night at 10pm, and Fred would be talking to me about a student’s interview with Danaher, and what he might have done differently to help her.

Be genuine.  If you knew Fred, you always knew where you stood.  He gave you feedback:  as a career consultant, as a colleague, as an employer, as a friend.  He had no agenda.  Just to be true to his calling.

Be a friend.  More than anything Fred was a friend.  He cared.  He showed it.  He had the team to his home for many beautiful lunches.  He brought vegetables from his garden to share.  He organized the poker group.  He came to every extra-curricular event, when he wasn’t required to attend.  And I always got the sense that Fred truly cared about me and my success.  He was genuine, tireless and patient.

I learned a lot from Fred.

Networking Lessons from a 12-year old

Published on April 20, 2012 in Uncategorized. 1 Comment

You hear a great deal about the importance of networking. I’ve blogged on it before. A couple of nights ago I had dinner at the Tuck School of Business with a colleague, Richard McNulty, and his family. He and his wife, mason braxton (2)Neely, are fun to spend an evening with, but their two kids, Mason, 15-year old girl, and Braxton, 12-year old boy, are really the master networkers.

Here’s what I learned about networking from M and B:

1. First impressions matter. Trite maybe, but upon meeting both Mason and Braxton, each approached me, offered a hand to shake, looked me in the eye, and said, “Hello, nice to meet you” (“see you again” in Braxton’s case, as he remembered singing karaoke with me in San Francisco about five years ago – not bad for a 10-year old). I was immediately put at ease by their approach, and also intrigued to learn more about them.

2. Be interesting and informed. Braxton picked up early on in the conversation my interest in sports and that I have a son at VCU. He immediately started talking about clip_image001Shaka Smart, VCU’s head basketball coach, his job offers from other schools, what makes Shaka and the Rams succeed, and why they didn’t make it to the sweet 16 this year (poor 3-point shooting!).

3. Show an interest, be inquisitive. Mason asked me about my job, my family, my 50th birthday plans, my travels, my blog, and my running. Braxton asked me about golf, Singapore, why I was in Hanover. And, they also offered an opinion on my answers, and occasionally argued with the answers, albeit respectfully. I could tell they were thinking and forming opinions and points of view. IMG_4020Braxton listened to my story then validated my opinion by telling a similar one about one of his friends who has faced a similar situation in sports.

4. Have a sense of humor. I laughed all evening: B talking about his golf game, Mason making fun of her dad’s hair (or lack thereof), Braxton and Mason joking with each other. Laughter triggers positive memories. It signals that I want to spend more time with these people.

5. Be empathetic. I told a story of my son’s quitting a sport he loved in high school because of a terrible, demeaning coach. Mason was courageous enough to say to me, “I feel really badly that happened to your son.” Wow, I’m never that empathetic – I gloss over uncomfortable situations (of course, I am a guy). Her acknowledgement created a bond and an impression of how deep feeling she is and how well she relates.

I guess most of these are intuitive, but bringing them altogether takes talent and practice.  But more than that, it takes a willingness  to Be yourself. I feel I really got to know Mason and Braxton during my two-hour visit. They were comfortable in their own skin and at ease with the situation. They weren’t trying to be the perfect kids or something their parents want them to be. They were just trying to be themselves, and it worked.Thanks Mason. Thanks Braxton.